You’ve been gone for close to six years, Sam. I miss you every day. I miss killing each other over that stupid card game. I miss being amazed over how a 100 lb kid could eat an entire pizza. I miss laughing in the hallways with you over the stupidest shit after band practice. I miss sharing a monster with you every morning. I miss the way you’d blast Skillet way too loud at literally the worst times possible. I miss your hugs. I think I’ve realized that you gave such great hugs because you needed someone to hold on to, to ground you for just a bit longer. I’m sorry you couldn’t find a reason to hold on. I’m sorry that you didn’t see any other way out. You should still be here being stupid and crazy and awesome. Call me crazy, but sometimes I feel you around. That never ceases to make me smile, even if it’s for a split second. Kid, I hope you’re having an epic time wherever you are, listening to awesome music as loud as you want, stuffing your face with monsters and pizza, and tackling people over card games all day. But most of all, I hope you are happy.
Thank you for saving my life, Sam. I wish you could see how far I’ve come. I know I would not be here today without you. I will never forget you.